The Story Behind Parker McCollum’s Song “Handle on You”

If you think there’s something “old school” about “Handle on You,” the song Parker McCollum wrote with veteran songwriter Monty Criswell, that’s due to both men’s influences that range from Willie Nelson, Buck Owens, and Porter Wagoner to Bob Dylan and George Strait.

But anyone who has heard the song knows that the songwriters put plenty of their personal stories into the song, telling the story of a man suffering over the end of a love relationship. The love relationship was one McCollum had lost. He used the pain he felt and his memories of drowning his sorrows in alcohol during the writing session. 

“I was really going through it, and I was drinking quite a bit and staying up all night trying to write sad country songs,” McCollum said. “I wasn’t really writing anything at the time and woke up real late one day, and Monty came over, and he had this title called ‘Handle On You,’ and I said, ‘Man, I’ve kind of been trying to get a handle on her.’”

In the meantime, the happily married Criswell not only had the title of the song in his mind but added memories of navigating the American Whiskey Trail, especially the roads through Tennessee and Kentucky, as he drove his student-daughter to the University of Kentucky. He also recalled the billboards advertising liquor dotting the roadways. His original thought of “Handle of Jack Daniels” morphed into “Handle on You.”

McCollum said Criswell’s imagery of Tennessee and Kentucky sparked the rest of the song.

“I had the phrase ‘Handle on You,’ in my mind when I went to meet Parker,” Criswell told American Songwriter of the July 1, 2020, writing session at the height of the pandemic. “As a songwriter, I love the double meaning of the phrase. And the thought of how it signals trying to get a grip on goodbye.”

The two spent their time at McCollum’s midtown Nashville condominium kicking ideas around and working on wordplay, finally settling on a song that centers around choosing the largest possible bottle of alcohol to drown the sorrow of a breakup.

I went and bought the biggest bottle they got ’cause you’re gone
Drop the needle on a vinyl and cry to an old Haggard song
Sittin’ at the table, baby, breaking the seal
Gonna see how much of this pain I can kill
I went and bought the biggest bottle they got ’cause you’re gone.

The nod to Haggard, one of Criswell’s main musical inspirations, is something he likes to add in as many songs as makes sense. It fits seamlessly into “Handle On You,” as do the other Easter eggs and imagery in the lyrics. But some of the clever wordplay in the song is the key to catching the listener’s ears and even makes the song an earworm for some. Criswell gives credit for the main witticism and plays on words, including the following, to McCollum.

I’ve been fightin’ with your memory, I hate the way it hits me
I wake up every day, black and blue
After all this back and forth, a fifth won’t do
Yeah, I finally got a handle, finally got a handle on you.

And they relied on what McCollum said was an internet joke for the first line in the following lyric, that again is ripe with imagery: 

I tell myself that I should quit but I don’t listen to drunks
I keep on sippin’ ’til, “I miss you” don’t roll off my tongue
Since you poured our love down the sink
I think I’ll just stay here and drink
I tell myself that I should quit but I don’t listen to drunks

As much as the two liked the song, it wasn’t immediately released. It was written toward the end of McCollum’s promotion of his previous album. And, like many writers, McCollum and Criswell moved on to other projects. But at some point, both men reconsidered the song and concluded it had great potential. “I’d play the song for someone, and they’d say, ‘Why hasn’t this been released?’” said Criswell.

Criswell recalls his surprise when McCollum reported he had demoed it and recorded the final version with producer Jon Randall, who worked to ensure it did not sound too similar to
Strait’s songs. A few contemporary flourishes and instrumentation made it McCollum’s own.

McCollum credits Criswell with the success of the song he released on his fourth studio album, Never Enough. The song went to No. 2 on the Country Airplay list and No. 10 on the Hot Country Songs list.

“It’s such a pleasure writing with (Criswell),” McCollum said. “He’s got a crazy talent for writing with an artist and letting them kind of take the lead and write to them, which is cool.”

Photo by Chris Kleinmeier / True Public Relations