The Meaning Behind “Tougher than the Rest” by Bruce Springsteen and Why It Continues to Live Up to Its Name

As great as it is, “Tougher than the Rest” by Bruce Springsteen brings some contradictions along with it. It’s an unabashed love song within an album full of relationship fractures. And it’s a testament to a long-term marriage, written at a time when the one of those marrieds was wed to somebody else.

Does any of that dilute the power of the song? Not really. But it does prove that sometimes songwriters have a kind of second sight, writing about things that they might not have yet encountered but their subconscious wants to will into existence. Let’s take a look back at the circumstances surrounding the creation of “Tougher than the Rest,” a song that has pretty much lived up to its name when you consider its standing among love songs.

Lost in the Tunnel

Bruce Springsteen stood atop the music world when he settled in to start recording the album Tunnel of Love, which would be released in 1987. His previous record, Born in the U.S.A., brought him the commercial success that finally matched his critical acclaim. In an era of megastars, Springsteen could go toe to toe with any of them for cultural reach and fan loyalty. There was one songwriting topic which he mostly had avoided that he wanted to tackle in depth: love.

Considering he seemed to have corralled that elusive emotion himself, what with his marriage to actress Julianne Phillips in 1985, it was reasonable to expect an album full of contentment and happiness. Tunnel of Love turned out to be anything but. The love affairs depicted on the record were rife with mistrust, insincerity, and outright deceit. Maybe it wasn’t such a good sign that the album was dedicated to Phillips.

A year after the album arrived, Springsteen and Phillips divorced. By that time, reports had already surfaced that Springsteen had begun seeing Patti Scialfa, who had joined the E Street Band as a backup singer a few years earlier. They would eventually wed in 1991, and they’ve been married ever since.

So how does “Tougher than the Rest” fit into all that? Springsteen explained in a recent interview with Howard Stern that the song might not have been written about that union, but it definitely anticipated it:

“[Scialfa and I] were both these sort of outsiders. And we came together, and we just sort of made that promise, like, ‘OK, this is the one that we make work. This is the one that we do the things that it takes to make work.’ And we both, you know, just operated on—we took that vow, and we were married long before I say we actually got married. We’ve been together for about 33 or 34 years.”

Springsteen would go on to explain elsewhere in the interview that the song now feels incomplete unless Scialfa is signing it with him. Indeed, the pair performed it every night together during The Boss’ appearances on Broadway within the last decade.

What is “Tougher than the Rest” About?

“Tougher than the Rest,” featuring an insistent beat, Danny Federici’s moody synths, and Springsteen’s harmonica bleats, delivers a promise about the stalwart nature of the narrator when it comes to relationships. Or, to be more accurate, when it comes to the relationship in question, as he implies that the girl he’s addressing has inspired this kind of strength in him.

He’s in it no matter what, unlike the others who let her down in the past: So somebody ran out / Let somebody’s heart in a mess. This guy doesn’t pretend that this is his first affair: Well, it ain’t no secret / I’ve been around a time or two. The bottom line is that he can summon the courage necessary for the long haul: The road is dark and it’s a thin, thin line / But I want you to know I’ll walk it for you any time.

In the end, he asks her to dance and to gird her loins for whatever life might throw at them if she says yes: And if you’re rough and ready for love / Honey, I’m tougher than the rest. Bruce Springsteen may have written and performed “Tougher than the Rest” before his marriage to Patti Scialfa, but the pair have nonetheless lived up to song’s promise ever since.

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Photo by Mike Coppola/Getty Images for Bob Woodruff Foundation