Remember the Time Old-School Advice Columnist Ann Landers Dissed Industrial Music?

The “Ask Ann Landers” advice column was a beloved American institution that ran from 1943 to 2002. What started as a popular Chicago column blossomed into an international phenomenon, and even after its original author, nurse Ruth Crowley, passed away at age 48 in 1955, her successor Eppie Lederer continued on after winning a contest. Readers would write in asking for advice on matters ranging from social etiquette to marital woes to teenage suicide. And at one point, “Ann Landers” dissed industrial music.

Riled in Rhode Island

The column often erred on the more traditional side, which likely explains when in December 1985 she responded to a “disgusted” dad who wrote in about the then-new trend of industrial music which he found irritating and baffling. He invoked a term created by Wall Street Journal reporter Diane Petzke (“junk rock”) in which musicians banged on sheets of metal and used pneumatic drills to coax noise from scrap metal objects. He mentioned how “a skinny young man screams in German amid a collection of dented car doors, a cement mixer and a refrigerator scavenged for the occasion, ready to be banged, drilled and scraped.”

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This concerned father was obviously describing the sounds of Einstürzende Neubauten, the pioneering West German industrial group that had formed in 1980. The lead singer Blixa Bargeld (the “skinny young man”) would also co-found Australian rock group Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds in 1983. But in 1985, Neubaten had released their third album Halber Mensch which had incorporated electronic dance sounds into it. Pitchfork has called it the second greatest industrial album of all time.

Not that that would matter to Ms. Landers. She replied: “Cool it, dad. This, too, shall pass. Let us hope it doesn’t produce a million deaf kids in the process. Aside from the hearing loss I see no danger in mistaking this trash for music long enough to make an impact on anyone.”

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In 1985, industrial music already spanned a wide range of sounds, not just the metal machine music of Einstürzende Neubauten. While there were certainly other noise-oriented acts like Throbbing Gristle and Esplendor Geométrico, more groove or dance-friendly groups like Front 242, SPK (then in their synth pop-ish phase), and Skinny Puppy had been making their mark. The rise of more commercially successful industrial rock and metal of acts like Ministry, Nine Inch Nails, and KMFDM was just around the corner. The ‘90s industrial underground crossed over into Goth and led to a further proliferation of more groups and subgenres.

So it did not pass. It just mutated like a virus and got stronger.

Hip to Be Square

A fun bit of trivia: Starting in the ’90s, SPK co-founder Graeme Revell became an award-winning film composer whose myriad credits include The Crow, Pitch Black, Daredevil, Sin City, and Riddick. Another SPK member, Brian William (a.k.a. Lustmord), has contributed sound design to film scores by Revell and Paul Haslinger (including two Underworld movies) and some Tool tracks, composed his own scores, and released a slew of great darkambient albums.

Back to the column: It’s actually rather impressive that not only did this father know what industrial music was, but that Ann Landers even gave it the time of the day. Perhaps her coverage helped more young people seek it out. Hey, it was the ‘80s, and in this same year the Parents Music Resource Center (PMRC) helped Senate hearings on obscenity and vulgarity in rock music. Who knows what they would have thought of industrial music had they heard it.

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