John Panther Mellotron, “Gold Grammys (Ain’t That Americana)”

We don’t know who “John Panther Mellotron” is, but someone forwarded us his lyrics, and we thought they were pretty damn funny.

Don’t miss tonight’s Americana Honors & Awards, being broadcast live on AXS TV and NPR Music.

“Gold Grammys (Ain’t That Americana)”
By John Panther Mellotron

There’s a white boy, wearin Ray Bans
Living in a hip neighborhood
He sings about hopping trains, picks a pricey banjo
He thinks man, I got it so good

There’s a young girl, in the kitchen
Smoking up a big fat bowl
And he looks at her and says I remember when Robert Plant was rock and roll

But ain’t that Americana, you and me
Ain’t that Americana , something to see
Ain’t that Americana, J.T.E.

A little gold Grammy for you and me.

There’s a young man, in suspenders
Listenin to a AAA station
He’s got pomaded hair and a pomaded smile
He thinks the Ryman must be his destination

Someone told him
When he was younger
Said, boy, Cash should be president
But just like everything those dreams just kinda came and went

But ain’t that Americana, a wagon wheel
Ain’t that Americana , a genre to steal
Ain’t that Americana, no layers to peel
Three or four chords, for you to feel!

And there’s string bands and more strings bands
And what do you know?
They go to work at their coffee shops
And then sing about the fields they gotta hoe

And there’s losers and there’s losers
But darlin don’t you know
That Buddy Miller wins all the awards at all the damn shows

But ain’t that Americana….