“I Have Not Forgiven Myself for Not Being Beethoven”: Inside Billy Joel’s Musical Turmoil

You got your passion, you got your pride / But don’t you know that only fools are satisfied?

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One of the many lines from “Vienna” that is outlined and filled with wisdom and honesty. Reportedly, “Vienna” was written as a type of memoir of Billy Joel and his estranged father’s relationship. The piece lyrically articulates what Joel’s father allegedly said to him about the experiences of aging. That being so, the line previously stated seems to be one of the many notions Joel carried with him for the majority of his career. A notion that caused him a music turmoil oriented in the strive for perfection.

Joel sat down with CBS Sunday Mornings Anthony Mason in 2018 and discussed the pitfalls and shortcomings of success. The interview itself is Joel candidly expressing how his pursuit of greatness interfered with the simplicities of life. In essence, the interview is an exposé of the tortured lives of artists such as Joel. Even though Joel takes his private helicopter to get to his shows at Madison Square Garden, the man’s experience is relative to anyone else pursuing a life in the arts.

Joel Is His Own Worst Critic

“A lot of that beating up was self-induced,” Joel explained to Mason about music critics. From then, Mason and Joel went on to discuss his first Grammy-winning song, “Just The Way You Are.” In which Joel openly expressed that the song did not age well. Following his 33 top 40 hits, Joel stated that his hiatus from music was because he “couldn’t be as good as [he] wanted to.”

To almost directly quote his own lyrics, Joel said, “just never being able to be satisfied.” Seemingly, it is this pursuit to constantly one-up the last thing he did that sent him into somewhat of a downward spiral. Joel took to drinking to tune out the noise, however, it was not this that got him through his predicament. Rather, it was his ability to accept the fact that true perfection is impossible.

Joel’s Epiphany

“I’ve forgiven myself for not being Beethoven,” was the Neil Diamond quote Joel found that cracked the interpersonal case he was trying to solve. Even though Joel found this quote, to this day he still hasn’t forgiven himself for not reaching the standards of the German composer, “I have not forgiven myself for not being Beethoven,” Joel says. Although, as torturous as this mindset may be, Billy Joel admitted that “it’s what drives great art.” That being, constantly seeking creative satisfaction and competing against oneself with each endeavor.

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